About Me

Inside of me there's a skinny woman SCREAMING to get out....I can usually shut her up with a box of chocolates!

Thursday, August 26, 2010

FACEmotionalBOOK

Lets digress from "weighty" issues, if just for a day.

Ok, I'm on facebook, who isn't these days, even my mom's on facebook. She keeps poking me?

I've used the friend finder to successfully hook-up with some long lost friends. All would be wonderful in the world of facebook except the one thing that's troubling me tremendously...

There's a certain "friend", well there are two actually, I won't mention names, who won't accept my friend requests!

The first is a really snooty___(fill in the blank)! We lived in the same neighbourhood, went to the same PUBLIC school but Miss Thang had a high pitched twang to her voice. One would swear she had attended a "model C" school her entire life. We were friends, sort of anyway, as teenagers, but lost contact after school. Ok, I'm not torn over her declining my invitation, I should never have expected better of 'Princess Margaret!' lol!

The second is where my grief and heartache sets in. We went to high school together, went to movies, had sleep-overs, all the other teenage stuff and were very close (or so I thought) and although we lost touch after high school, well, in my head I still thought that we were friends.

Well, when she didn't immediately accept my invite, I assumed that she wasn't on facebook that often, so I waited. Lo and behold, there she was, commenting left, right and centre on mutual friends status updates, so she MUST have seen my request, but still no response. So I sent her another request, and another and yet another...and nothing! I'm not stupid, after the 4th, maybe 5th request(I'm not stalking), I realised that she'd declined my invite.

Why? What did I ever do to her? I went onto her profile a few times (I'm NOT stalking!) and I've seen for myself that she has regular status updates. How am I supposed to feel when I see "So and So is now friends with Trevor Noah and 5 other people", and I'm not one of the 5? We have 10 mutual friends, come on!

Okay, it might be because she had a major crush on a certain guy right throughout high-school and that certain guy later became my husband, or maybe it's because my profile picture is one where my husband is giving me a big smooch on my forehead and we look like we're crazy in love? (Well we are, besides the times when he doesn't use toilet spray after using the toilet)

If there's anything I hate more than being hungry, it's being rejected! I'm thinking about sending her a short inbox message, something like "WHY WON'T YOU ACCEPT ME??", but that might seem a bit too stalker-like (I'm still considering it). My heart feels like it's been ripped to shreds!

How can someone be so heartless? I've been eating chocolates non-stop to fill the void that SHE'S created.

Oh, wait, to be honest, I eat chocolates non-stop- PERIOD...

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

Damn those mirrors!!!

So, I went clothes shopping on Saturday...what a disaster! I had to go to the doctor for anti-depressants afterwards. (looking back now, I should've asked him for diet pills, Duramine maybe...hmm, I'm going to have to take a trip back to the doc)

Why would a retailer put 3 way mirrors in a fitting room? Why would they be SO cruel? Do I REALLY need to look at myself from EVERY angle? I was horrified (to say the least) by what I saw.
My body has dimples in places I never knew dimples could possibly exist, and, am I really THAT rotund? I think those mirrors are magnified. No, I KNOW those mirrors are magnified! I will not believe otherwise....

Oh, and another thing, what's this new trend in clothing supposed to be? I ask for my size, 36 (okay, you got me, 38) and the sales lady tells me that these tops are "free size"?! So I ask what free size is, and she replies that "one size fits all"....excuse me?!
I'm too scared to buy one of these free size thingy's ...in my minds eye I see myself wearing this "top" and thinking I'm all cute and then pass a little size 28 girl wearing the same "top" as a dress. I would die of embarrassment!

Look, I don't know how I'm supposed to lose weight...I'm at a loss. I watch TV and see that there are people who eat when they are depressed, some who eat when they are stressed and some who use food as a crutch to get through life. I thought about why I'm fat and came to this conclusion, I LOVE FOOD! Yes, food is my thing. I love to eat, I love to cook and I love to watch people eat what I cook and then say that it was delicious.
Okay, maybe I can increase the whole exercise thing. My treadmill has been gathering dust and my poor power plate hasn't had some wobbly blubber on it for at least 6 months. I could start with that and then see where it takes me.

I'm tired already, just thinking about it... I wonder if I've burned any calories whilst typing....